


Quick, Quicker, Quickest

by Sandrene09



Category: Smosh
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst, M/M, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-24
Updated: 2015-01-24
Packaged: 2018-03-08 20:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3222365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandrene09/pseuds/Sandrene09
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>What would he like to change?</em>  Post-Time Traveling Pickup Master.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Quick, Quicker, Quickest

**Author's Note:**

> I had writer’s block. Then I watched the Smosh video of the week. Suddenly, I didn’t have writer’s block anymore. However, my laptop is still quite broken (aka I can’t depend on it anymore) so I had to write this on my mother’s laptop. I still want to be able to produce at least one fic a month, but I imagine that would be harder to do now, with the circumstances. This is just a quick fic (an effort to shake away the writer’s block). Comments are, once again, appreciated.

Now that Ian actually has this… _thing_ —he refuses to call it a time travelling machine because that just doesn’t sound right at all—he doesn’t know what he’s going to do. It should be a lot easier, really. All the movies and the books in the world say that whenever one is in possession of something like this, a moment one would like to get back to will quickly spring into mind.

But Ian’s mind is blank. Instead of a smile on his face and a thousand and one scenes he would like to change for the better, there is a blank look on his face and an even blanker mind.

What would he like to change?

Ian raises an eyebrow and manages to sneak a peek at Anthony who is seated at the nearby table with his beautiful date. There _is_ one thing he would like to change, but as he looks back down at this glass-encased device he _still_ isn’t sure is actually real, he changes his mind.

No meddling in the past, present, or future will change Anthony’s sexual orientation to make him magically fall in love with Ian. As unreal as this whole thing is, there are just some things that are out of reach.

Ian sighs.

He looks over at Anthony’s table and bites his lip anxiously. He should be helping his best friend interest this girl. He should be an actual wingman instead of being this lovesick guy. He’s also quite sure that he’s not himself if he’s holding something this powerful in his hands and isn’t doing anything about it.

Reaching a hand back to rub the back of his neck, he looks at the device in his hands and starts thinking. There _are_ a couple of embarrassing things he would have rather avoided back in his childhood, but Ian’s not sure if it’s really worth it to go back in time and change them, especially since he doesn’t think they’re important enough to actually change aspects of his life.

Ian suppresses the urge to groan. This wouldn’t be so hard if he hadn’t met Anthony. It wouldn’t be this hard if he hadn’t seen Anthony smile, or heard Anthony talk, or felt Anthony’s comforting hugs.

It wouldn’t be this hard if he had never been Anthony’s friend.

Ian blinks, realization dawning on his face before quickly falling again.

No. As sad as his whole situation is, he would never actually give it up for a life without Anthony. He owes so much to the man he now calls his best friend. He wouldn’t be this successful without him, or this happy. Before their happy accident of a success story, he hadn’t actually known what he was going to do with his life, hadn’t actually known what job he would get, and now look at him. He’s doing what he loves for a living with his best friend.

He wouldn’t give that up for the world.

Biting his lip, Ian looks back at Anthony’s table. He looks almost desperate, even though Ian doesn’t know why. The girl—Veronica—just looks bored. Ian doesn’t know why—he’s sure he would give almost anything to be at that table instead of her.

It’s that thought that makes the world spin in just the right way, makes the puzzle pieces fit in Ian’s mind. It’s that which makes him look at the device, his eyes wide, and his mind suddenly moving a hundred miles per second.

Maybe—maybe he doesn’t need to not meet Anthony to avoid the mess he had somehow gotten himself into. Maybe he just needs to not fall in love.

He feels the breath stutter in his lungs, as if acknowledging that _yes_ , he’s making a Very Bad Decision. Despite this, however, despite the sudden sweat in the palms of his hands and the suddenly too-quick beating of his heart, he thinks there is nothing for him to lose. The best thing that can happen is for him to lose the Feelings—with a capital F—and the worst thing that can happen is for nothing to change at all.

What’s the harm in trying?

Famous last words.

-.-.-.-

It’s an hour before the date and Anthony doesn’t know what to wear.

Ian watches from the doorframe as Anthony debates between a polo or a plaid shirt, watches Anthony see him from the mirror, watches Anthony smile as he turns around, a question ready on his lips.

Ian quickly averts his eyes from Anthony and presses the button.

No more smiles.

He goes back a day and avoids Anthony as he laughs at a funny video and starts to show it to Ian. He goes back two days and tries his best not to hear Anthony singing in the shower to Britney Spears. He goes back three days and avoids the smile Anthony shoots his way after he gets amazing news concerning some of their projects.

Four days and he ignores the way Anthony bites his lip when he’s thinking something over. Five days and he tries his best not to smell the minty scent of the aftershave Anthony always uses. Six days and he tries to pretend he doesn’t hear Anthony jerking off in the shower.

When he fails to pretend, he closes his eyes and groans, wishing that he wasn’t in _so deep_ to actually imagine that Anthony’s moaning his name, or at least half of it as the rest gets broken with his release.

A week and he tries to ignore how Anthony looks so good even while sweaty and having just finished working out. Two weeks and he ignores the way Anthony looks so sweet, playing with Daisy in the nearby park. Three weeks and he focuses on the road, instead of how natural Anthony looks, sitting there beside Ian as he drives.

A month, and Ian stops himself from driving to Anthony’s to see if he’s all right. Two months, and Ian doesn’t offer support when Anthony and Kalel fall apart.

Three months, four months, five months—a kaleidoscope of images and memories are meticulously picked apart and observed, one by one, until everything and anything that can be attributed to helping Ian fall even more in love with his ridiculous best friend is wiped away from this slate of space and time.

He is quick when he changes his actions, and even quicker when he presses the button. There are a lot of things to do, after all.

Everything is harder to change when he starts going back years. He watches his younger self look at Anthony and he feels a pang in his heart, an acknowledgment that he is making a decision for his younger selves that they might not actually approve of. He is stripping his past selves of the pain, he reminds himself, but it isn’t just that. He is wiping away Anthony’s smile in their minds. He is removing laughter and hugs and support, things that Ian would never have given up for anything in the world.

Anything except this, it turns out.

Everything is a blur after that. He doesn’t quite know how he does it, doesn’t quite know how he manages to be in _just_ the right time, but he doesn’t question it. It’s making his job a lot easier, after all.

It’s later, when he has gone back years and years, when he stops and looks at the house near him. It’s his old house—the one he grew up in as a child, when his mom and dad moved into Sacramento—and he doesn’t actually know why he’s here.

Quietly, he makes his way to the back of the house and finds the window of his bedroom. A younger version of him is in there as well as a younger version of Anthony, and Ian realizes that it’s in this time and place when younger him first saw Anthony in a different light.

He doesn’t remember this moment anymore. If Ian were asked to actually name the moment he realized he liked Anthony in that way, this memory would never have even entered his mind.

Ian bites his lip and looks down at his feet. Is all of this really worth it? He thinks he’s afraid to know the answer.

It’s going to be worth it, he tells himself. It’s going to be worth it.

Steeling his resolve, he bends down, picks up a pebble, and throws it at the window hard enough to catch younger Ian’s attention. He hopes that will be enough. He doesn’t think he can do anything more.

With a last lingering look at the house before him, Ian smiles sadly and presses the button on his device.

He doesn’t know if he’ll like what he’s done or if what he has done will actually work, but he thinks it’s too late now.

-.-.-.-

Anthony sighs as he bows his head. Biting his lip, he looks up, takes a deep breath, and gives Veronica a small shy smile.

“Look, I’m really sorry, but I think we’re not really enjoying this date,” he says, and he watches with some amusement as Veronica raises an eyebrow as if to say, “you think?”

Veronica smiles. She really _is_ beautiful, and she knows how to make great conversation, but something’s just lacking.

Anthony resolutely ignores the voice in his head saying, “Ian” in an increasing volume.

“You seem really nice,” she says, and the compliment is genuine. “It’s just that I don’t think we’re right for each other. I also feel like you’re not really serious about this.”

Anthony opens his mouth and quickly shuts it. “You’re right,” he eventually says, because he could at least be honest with this girl. “I am not serious about this. You see that guy over there?” he asks, glancing at Ian from the corners of his eyes.

“Yes,” she says as she sneaks a look.

Anthony smiles and looks down at his hands. “He’s my best friend and I think I like him.”

Those words aren’t enough. They aren’t enough to convey just how much Anthony wants to be able to hug Ian tight, how much Anthony wants to be able to kiss Ian breathless. They aren’t enough to express the _want_ Anthony often feels in his chest, the desire that makes his heart feel heavy and bleeding. They aren’t enough to show just how much Anthony aches to be allowed to be all the things that he isn’t to Ian, to be boyfriend and lover, to be caregiver and protector, to be the one to sleep beside him and to be the one to accompany him to everything, no questions asked.

Those words aren’t enough to express just how much Anthony wants for it to be Ian sitting across him instead of her.

Veronica puts her hand on top of Anthony’s, and Anthony looks up, startled.

“You should go for it, then,” she says, a kind smile on her face.

“Maybe I will,” he says, but he knows he won’t. He won’t risk their friendship. He knows he would rather have what he has now than nothing at all. Sure, it may be a cowardly thing to do, but he knows he just isn’t ready to shake the foundations of their friendship.

Losing their friendship is not worth it.

-.-.-.-

Ian blinks and suddenly, he is at the table again. The device is still in his hands, and there is nothing of what he had felt for Anthony in his mind anymore.

There are no rose-colored thoughts. There are no lingering touches or half-hidden smiles. There are no memories of smiles directed at him or looking at Anthony when he’s looking away, only thoughts.

It worked.

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Smosh. I do not make money from this.


End file.
